Oct 31 2007
Notice - no title up there? That’s exactly like me. Muted. That’s because I still.can’t.fucking.talk. Yesterday, when I took the damn sick day, I could talk. I had cramps, I was snotty, (that’s full of snot, not a description of my personality okay?), I had a hacking cough. Today? I woke up and, seriously, not a sound will come out. (Mr. Hot doesn’t seem to mind this situation….and the people at work? Dammit. They can stop laughing any time.)
Nothing hurts (well, except that I can’t talk and that hurts my heart, because I want to yell at some of these idiots) but I’m feeling damn out of control. (That’s your cue to nod in sympathy.)
Send candy. (No, wait, I pledged No Candy. Damn. Send cheese! and Wine!)
So, today is Halloween. We live out a two-lane country road, about a mile from the main drag. Our subdivision has 7 houses, each on an acre lot. No one is crazy enough to come see us on Halloween. Last year, the only guy that showed up for treats was the gas man. Honest. He knocked on the door, said something about the neighbors across the road “smelling gas” and went down into our basement.
(Hey! that would be a great beginning to a screenplay for a new scary movie - “The Gasman Always Rings Twice”.)
After he came back up and said that he didn’t smell any gas in our basement, so everything should be fine, I gave him the entire bowl of Snickers miniature candy bars. Because, y’know, I hate Snickers - if I’d have bought Milky Ways, he’s have been walking away empty-handed.
He laughed and said that Halloween and Thanksgiving were his two favorite days to check out possible leaks. No shit. Funny, we never smelled gas. And the neighbors that called him? Weren’t even home. Let’s be optimistic and believe the neighbors evacuated, and not that DTE Energy reps regularly make up gas leaks to get free candy.
Now you watch. Because I didn’t buy anything to pass out, we’ll get someone ringing our bell. I’ll have to raid the change jar on the counter. Or maybe I could pass out Milkbones. I think there’s an extra box in the cabinet. Poopy won’t mind too much.
—- Or, Halls throat lozenges! Because they’re doing me no-effing-good right now. —-
HOT LOVE
Please tell me you are resting - perhaps you can write a note to your secretary and spell your name in caps so she can start learning how to spell??
Just rest - and know that when you can start talkin’ - they’ve had their vacation and they better start working again.
No voice, yuck, but it’s better than a scratchy hurting throat.
Hope this gets out of your system soon!
*do not whisper* it’s HORRIBLE for your vocal cords.
Just an fyi from your friendly neighborhood Speech Pathologist.
And funny about the MIlky Way - I detest them.
Ugh! I hope you feel better and your voice returns. I think some Milky Ways would help the situation, vow be damned!
Poor you. If you really need to yell at someone, I can think of a few helpful hand gestures you could use instead.
You have given up candy? Are you out of your fucking mind? Now I’m going to have to eat your share just to make sure that the Global Candy Karma stays in balance.
I nearly imploded the last time I lost my voice due to being sick.
Rest/Hydrate.
First of all, you must be sick, because who in their right minds would pass up a Snickers for a Milky Way?
Try some Nyquil or something. And get those tastebuds sorted out.
Ree- Got news for ya, hon. The voice won’t come back until you get antibiotics. No shit. This happened to me twice. WILL.NOT.COME.BACK. without them. Hugs!
I wish I could laugh. You all are hilarious.
I’m resting - Nyquil and a vodka/cranberry worked wonders for letting me sleep last night.
Snickers? The nuts get in my teeth and take away from the chocolately goodness. Nuts OR chocolate, but I really don’t like them together.
Helen - Tea and Honey? Maybe? I hate going to the dr. for something so trivial. I’ll give it today. If it’s not back by this afternoon, I’ll call.
Goodness, Mrs. Hottttt! Get better soon. I’m feeling fine, so I guess you didn’t manage to spread your germs around Chicago.
*hugs to you*
I had a clever comment all figured out, but then I saw that you don’t like Snickers, and what can I possibly say to that? O.o
Hehehe, try some hot lemon tea with honey for the throat. And those door to door guys have it down let me tell ya. At least you didn’t have to go out and freeze your arse off!
Hehehe, try some hot lemon tea with honey for the throat. And those door to door guys have it down let me tell ya. At least you didn’t have to go out and freeze your arse off!