Jan 16 2008
The Meeting
Y’all are too funny. You really want to know about the meeting yesterday? Well, good, because dinner last night with my boyfriends was a non-event. I mean, they’re always fun, but, being a travel day for all of us (they’re all from New York and travel to Chicago weekly) we were all just too exhausted to get too loud. I got to the hotel around 8:15, spoke for a few minutes with Mr. Hot, and crashed. The alarm went off at 6 this morning - I swear it was the first time I moved all night.
Tonight will be a different story, I’m sure. The restaurant we’re going to has a “martini flight” on the menu. You get a sampling of martinis: Cosmopolitan, Green Apple, Wild Raspberry Cosmopolitan and Stormy Night*. Tonight? May be a loud night.
So, the meeting yesterday. First, I posted about this person before. Go read this. Janice is her name - undermining the efforts of others is her game.
The only reason I met with the shrew Janice yesterday was because (as I may have mentioned), I don’t really have a lot to do these days. I’m just minding the store right now - making life miserable for my staff sure that the buyer gets what they need from our systems before we pull the plug.
And because I haven’t heard anything from my recruiter yet that sounds promising in the Ann Arbor area, and Janice’s boss went to my boss and asked “Can Hotfessional help us out on a couple of important projects? She has the most experience in what we need to do.”, I’m helping. I’m nice like that. (Plus, I like my paycheck, and the longer I keep getting it, the closer we get to Shortman’s graduation. After he graduates, I’m thinking about opening a hair-braiding business on some beach in Tahiti.)
The meeting yesterday was about this project. Total budget for the project? $2 million. My portion of the project? $25,000. Say it with me. Yip-fuckin-ee. Without going into too much detail, there’s not a lot of technology work here. It’s pretty brainless work. (Shut.up. That wasn’t nice.)
The meeting itself was typical for Janice. She has cubicle space, not an office, and her guest chairs are behind her while she’s at her computer. She saw me approach from the front, said hello, and continued working while I sat down. (She’s nothing if not rude!) Her excuses to me (with her back still to me) was that she was printing off the spreadsheet I needed to see. She sent the document to the printer, got up to go get it, and came back empty-handed, bitching about someone printing a 45-page document.
She hasn’t made eye contact yet. We’re 10 minutes into the meeting before she turns around.
While we’re waiting for the document, she gives me the general background. New computers for a bunch of departments, new operating system, need to make sure the software they use works. No money available for re-engineering anything. If the software doesn’t work, it will need to be replaced. Blah.Blah.Blah. So far, other than being ignored for 10 minutes, all was okay. I had thought about bitch-slapping her, but murder hadn’t yet crossed my mind.
Then we got to the spreadsheet.
I have to mention that 75% of the software in use by her client was either written by my group or supported by my group at some point in the last 8 years. I may not know all of the enhancements that have been done, but I do know, generally, what the software is used for. And it’s criticality to the business.
Y’all? She laid that spreadsheet in front of me and said, “Now, I know what nearly all of this is, so if you have any questions, just stop me. Because you probably only know a few of these names.”
In THAT.TONE.
You know that tone, right? That sing-songy, ‘I’m so much better than you’ tone that makes you want to reach out and wrap your hands around her skinny little throat…..? Oh, wait. Is that just me? Sorry.
Instead of reaching across the desk, I smile politely and nod as she goes through the 152 lines. And y’all? She is so faking it. Faking like Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. Faking like Pamela Anderson’s boobs. She has no clue what some of these programs are, how they relate to her business client’s needs.
And at that point, I actually felt sorry for her. I know her peers hate her. Her staff makes fun of her behind her back. She has no clue what she’s talking about. It must be horrible to come to work every day knowing that you got your job so that some executive could say that he had the correct ratio of women in his leadership ranks.
—- That was really it. It all hit me suddenly. Her boss asked me to help. She obviously was completely uncomfortable having to ask for my help. So I thanked her, told her I’d make sure her clients got what they needed, and took my spreadsheet and walked away. Did I grow up some yesterday? Perhaps. Did I grow a little in confidence myself? Probably. Did I still wish that she’d trip on her stilettos and fall flat on her face in a meeting? You bet your sweet ass. But now? I wouldn’t laugh out loud when it happened. —-
*Stormy Night Martini -> EFFEN Black Cherry, DEKUYPER Watermelon Pucker, DEKUYPER Island Blue Pucker, sour mix
**And you all? I really will email you back in response to your comments. I’m just a couple of days behind because, y’know, the sleeping makes it hard to type.
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Awe, you are indeed kind.
As she went through the spreadsheet, leaving you opportunity to “question” things so she could fill you in, I admit, I’d be tempted to ask questions I knew she couldn’t answer … but you could. [insert evil cackle here]
Martoonies? I’d say pomegranate is my new fav …shaken of course!
Nancy’s last blog post..Mitt, Mac, and Mike
Oooh, I need to know what bar that is because I NEED to try that martini flight!
I’m with Nancy…I would have asked her things she didn’t know. Mwhahaha!
I have a guy like that I work with. He’s 26 and thinks he’s my boss. I try to just ignore it and blame it on his age because I was probably the same at that age. And I also tell myself it is because he’s intimidated by my overall awesomeness.
That and he does nothing all day.
Kristabella’s last blog post..So Now I Have To Write On My Own Blog?
Further proof for why I don’t work for women. I hate to say it, but we can be absolutely impossible. I once worked for a woman who refused to call me Candy. She said it was unprofessional and I was to sign all paperwork by my given name, Candace, and tell all the other staff members to call me Candace, etc. I guess I should be happy she didn’t like the name George.
Candy’s last blog post..Random Stuff Because I’m Tired and Busy and Nothing is Happening
I’m hoping you got yourself some karma points so your flight gets you home, say, easily.
Um. and if you say “sleep” one more time in the context of getting some … I will steal all your wine…
Dawn’s last blog post..Eighth Annual Weblog Awards
Martini Martini Martini. That’s all I got. You’re going to have to give us a detailed review, and I do mean detailed.
Marie’s last blog post..Alternative Stealth
Good karma is coming your way - you did good! And that Martini bar sounds like heaven today!
So you think TRAVEL AND SLEEP is a reason to ignore us?!?! REALLY REE? Is that where you’re going with that? ;D Next you’ll be blaming the suck ass snow. ;D
imhelendt’s last blog post..Oh Snow, how I love thee! It’s your cousin Ice, that I hate?.
OK
If your a bitch, go behind HER back and get HER job. Its easy, your good at it, I know you have it in you (anyone that uses stiletto boots has to maintain the image every so often you know)
If your not, well, do the next best thing, make sure that you plant enough bombs in it so as to create call backs. And while that makes you still a bitch, it makes you look like a sweet one to her boss, and also makes HER look like an imbecile.
Come on Hot, go for DOOR Number One.
LarryLilly’s last blog post..Its been a long time….
I’m proud of you…you were gracious when you could have been really evil and called her bluff.
I think that calls for a martini or five…
Heidi
Heidi’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday
The cocktails sound FABULOUS. I wish I was there with you in spirit.
It IS a little sad when people are nasty, just because they are insecure. I’d be still wanting her to trip and show some humiliation, but yeah…. pity. Lots of pity.
Have a ball!
alyndabear’s last blog post..On Bagels and Broken Bits.
I’m with Heidi; I’m proud of you, too. Gracious is always the way to go. It only makes you look better. Her boss has already called you in to “help” her out - he knows you know more than she does. If you handle it graciously, that only makes you look professional and classy on top of being brilliant! Great move!
Shelly’s last blog post..Pat Conroy
You are so much more adult than me. I would have called her on some of the stuff she was talking nonsense about. And then tried rather ineffectively to hide my amusement.
Solomon Broad’s last blog post..Wednesday 16 January
Definitely a good case to take the high road… and then blog about it later so the rest of us can snicker at Janice behind her back! Muahahahaha
Laurel’s last blog post..Healthy Cooking Start
I agree! You need to go after her job, you obviously know much for than she can even fake. She sounds like a miserable lost soul. Well played, Hotfessional!
Vanessa’s last blog post..Recent Observations
Props for being the adult in the situation. Sounds to me that if you didn’t grow up a bit you at least had an ephiany worth remembering the next time she uses THAT.TONE!
Wbppsh7’s last blog post..Chaos
Did you at least say “That’s nice” to her?
witchypoo’s last blog post..Meme on Good Household Tips
I work with a girl like that too (I actually just blogged about her stupidity today). She is always talking to me in that tone…as if we don’t work in the same field and I couldn’t possibly understand a single thing about what she does. Drives me nuts.
Erin’s last blog post..The Epitome of Stupidity
I think this can be applied to most people who piss me off. I should just feel sorry for them, because obviously they are miserable, stupid, or both. But sometimes, you have to admit (don’t you?), it’s FUN to laugh at them as their face hits the carpet, isn’t it? Unfortunately though, as soon as they get back up, you are right back where you were to begin with.
cookiebitch’s last blog post..VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO STAR
I feel sorry for her now too, rather than pissed off on your behalf. I would still smirk if she fell over though.
Veronica’s last blog post..The Toddler
Well doesn’t she sound like a little ray of sunshine? Gee I wish I could be as classy as you were in that situation. I would have probably stooped down to her level and that wouldn’t have achieved a damn thing. Hmmmm….a Cosmo coming right up!
Gypsy’s last blog post..New Horizons……
It’s safe to say you can get your drunk on now. You earned a buffet of martinis. And here’s to you, for realizing that you rock and she, well, it’s just so very sad.
Melissa’s last blog post..Ruminations
You took the high road and I am just so proud of you.
[wiping a tear from my eye...]
My little Hot is all grown up.
Jen on the Edge’s last blog post..Jumping
Awww…you were sooo much nicer than I could have been
Carrie’s last blog post..eBay Sellers beware!!!!!!!!!!!!