Feb 26 2008
A Letter to My Body
Dear Body,
You were so skinny. So tall. Your feet kept growing and growing. I hated that all of the clothes that my friends were wearing; the bell bottom jeans, the midi skirts; looked nothing like they were supposed to when worn by you. Nothing about hearing the term “floods” made me think of water - only that you continued rocketing skyward, a sunflower - a beanstalk - a giraffe.
When you were in High School, the boys were interested in walking behind you, but not dating you. Apparently the view from behind was quite exciting for them, but get around to the front? The acne, the coke-bottle glasses, and the nose (oh, how you hated your nose - a holdback from years earlier - nothing like being compared to a flamingo - for the length of your legs AND the size of your beak).
When you first started thinking about making a baby, nothing worked. Years of going without birth control. When the doctors said that it wasn’t your fault, you moved on. It wasn’t the only reason, but it certainly didn’t keep you interested in staying put. You mourned for what you couldn’t have. People commented on how small; how tiny; how ill you looked. And yet, you focused on learning so much more about life and love.
And then, one day you woke me up at 2 in the morning, soaking my sheets, to let me know that you were done holding onto my baby. You strained and sweated through the day and evening, and then gave me that son. My healthy, happy little boy; grown now to a happy and healthy young man.
And now, you’re telling me that it’s time to move onto the next stage. The stage where you no longer prepare for the possibility of nourishing and sheltering a baby. The stage where, according to the magazines, you’ll give me “renewed energy” and “confidence in myself.” And also, “hot flashes” and “vaginal dryness” and “decreased libido”. (Can we do without those last things, please?)
I’ve noticed that you hold onto the chocolate now. You hold onto the bread and the cheese and the wine. I’ve been pushing you harder lately, because I know that you love these things - so you must help me by allowing me to run a little further - a little faster - you must let me lift more weight and kick higher. You must stop screaming when I bend your knees or move your hips. (And while we’re at it, since you’re telling me that you’re getting older, could you stop the oil production that causes pimples to appear in my wrinkles?)
I will always love you. I love that you have allowed me to live these 45 years without serious illness; without breaking down. I promise that I will continue to love you until you decide you can no longer carry me through my days and we part ways. I promise that whatever is left of you will be given to another - and I hope you will serve that life as well as you have served me.
Always, and Sincerely,
The Hotfessional
P.S. Seriously, though, this slowing metabolism? Sucks eggs (which I shouldn’t eat anymore) - so if you want to speed that up a bit? I’d appreciate it. XX
—- Go check out BlogHer for more Letters To My Body. —-
HOT LOVE
I fricken HATE the bloating. The zits have got to go. And I laugh every month and think of you when the bloating goes down WHILE I’ve got my period. I am SO SICK of this! I’ve been in this premature ovarian failure for 3 years now. FAIL ALREADY. The least my body could do would be to stop with the effin periods!
imhelendt’s last blog post..The story of the hillbilly tooth and Karma?.
Ah, Hot, you write a wicked good post.
Beauty. Just beauty.
witchypoo’s last blog post..Tickle Me Tuesday the Fourth
Hot flashes just fucking SUCK DIRT.
flutterby’s last blog post..It’s not Mardi Gras but….
I can’t eat anything without gaining weight. I hate it.
suburbancorrespondent’s last blog post..Handbag Math
I have been in what my doctor describes as a “premenopausal stage” for YEARS now.
So get on with it and MENOPAUSE already, and get it over with! I’m SO tired of dealing with all of it . . . *sigh*
Liz J in Illinois’s last blog post..Um - - What???
I so understand the frustration of having one part of me interest the boys, but not being good enough to ask out. I dated, but I didn’t exactly expect much in a guy for a long time, and I didn’t get much, for that reason.
For me, it was my chest they wanted to stare at. The rest of me, they had no interest in…
Oh, and the body not getting pregnant - I had that issue as well. But, it was me.
Nice job on this!
RC’s last blog post..The world is a smorgasbord
yeah the metabolism shit is not even funny.
zoe’s last blog post..Love me Love me not
Your letter reminds me of Shakespeare’s Quote: “Life’s a stage and we are merely players…” Our body goes through all these crazy stages and we don’t even think about how different each one is until it’s upon us.
Awesome letter. I don’t think I’m SPEAKING to my own body at the moment…
marlee’s last blog post..Babystep #1
Ahhhh yes, I could write a letter to my body, but it wouldn’t be a nice one. And I am not sure that it would voluntarily read it. LOL
OMG you rock.
Dawn’s last blog post..Letter to my body
The part about holding onto chocolate: I so badly wish it wouldn’t…
Heidi
Heidi’s last blog post..When The Mom Isn’t Looking…
I think there is something about the back view that teenage boys lurve!
Veronica’s last blog post..Full of Sunshine and Stuff
What? Um, but chocolate is a VEGETABLE! And the doctors say you should drink red wine for health. And you like NEED cheese for like calcium and protein and OMG like to be able to breathe….
NO!! Nooooooo- ooooo-ooooooo *deep breath* oooooooooooooooo!!!!! Say it isn’t so Ree. Say it isn’t so.
Don’t take away the cheese.
Sometimes being a chick freaking sucks donkeys balls.
Kelley’s last blog post..Miscellaneous. Now with added SHOE BLING!!!
That’s absolutely beautiful.
Solomon Broad’s last blog post..Things I’m Grateful For on Wednesday 27 February
Very nice, Hot. Can we trade bodies? Mine’s a bit broken down. Short. Pudgy. OK Fat, if you insist. But I’d like to be tall, just once.
Candy’s last blog post..My Kingdom For a Post!
I wish it didn’t have to be like that…our bodies are a gift and do amazing things, but for women? They are also such a burden.
Melissa’s last blog post..Free to be me
[…] Hotfessional has posted a really beautiful letter to her body on her blog, […]
Chocolate….what’s with the body craving for chocolate and then when you give it what it wants, it then has the cheek to put on weight. Ungrateful little turd.
Gypsy’s last blog post..Another day of lights, camera……ACTION
What a great post… although I hope your body lets you enjoy bread and cheese and chocolate a little more, too. It’s too delicious to give up.
Laurel’s last blog post..Blog Share II
Stupid slowing metabolism. Man I miss the days when I could splurge on fast food for a week and my pants would still fit.
Kristabella’s last blog post..The Great Interview Experiment
don’t.want.to.talk.about.it.damn.it.
Fannie’s last blog post..GNO: A Re-Cap in Pictures
Yet another reason I am so glad I am Not. A. Girl.
lceel’s last blog post..Wordy Wednesday
This was a great letter…all the way to the end, when you gave me goosebumps. Excellent.
Jennifer’s last blog post..The Girl He Married
[…] 27, 2008 by barbetti I know several bloggers are blogging “Letter To My Body” which I seriously considered jumping on to. […]
WHY didn’t I comment first time I read this?
Oh, I remember…I was too busy trying not to snuffle at work, remembering being the tall girl and thinking ‘My od, she was just like me.’
Thank you, Ree.
daysgoby’s last blog post..letter to me
Love this post. In fact, I kind of want to marry it. You are a perfectly brilliant writer.
I do not love the fact that this is probably our last beab… and I don’t have too much time before I don’t have the option anymore. Why does that rub? I should be THRILLED to move on from this stage… but, I’m not. I guess that’s just how we’re built. We always want yesterday more than tomorrow.
Meghan’s last blog post..The Best Models