Jul 15 2008
A Giant Baby Step
I’m back in Chicago this week - the first time since my favorite boss in the whole wide world retired and we had a big party for him. The first time since meeting up with Bossy. The first time since coming out to the world about my, um, hairless state.
The first time that any of these people have seen me wearing a scarf to cover my bald-as-a-cue-ball head.
And so, far, y’know, it’s been just fine.
Granted, I haven’t left my floor very often. And I ate lunch at 11 a.m. (hey, it was Noon for my body clock).
And I did get “I’ll have to pat down your scarf” at the airport. I thought about making a smart-ass comment about the kids walking through in ball caps, but it was 5:45 - in the morning - I just wasn’t in any mood to be hauled off to be strip-searched in the Detroit TSA room before 6 a.m.
So, I submitted to the security agent touching me on the back of the head. No contraband was found(!), so I was allowed to go my merry way.
One bitch (the same one that I had a meeting with) here in the office made some comment about how “green” I was. Once again, the immediate smartass comment that came to mind was, “Well, duh. I’m trying not to puke at the sight of you.”
But I didn’t.
I smiled. And walked away.
I no longer want to cry when I look in the mirror. Baby steps, right?
I told Mr. Hot last night that I wasn’t getting up until 4 a.m. today (to catch that freakin’ early-dark-thirty flight) because “I don’t have to worry about fixing my hair.”
Baby steps.
I pay close attention to my makeup now. I used to be very self-conscious about wearing low-cut tops that showed cleavage. Not anymore. You want to look at my rack? Let me make it easier for you.
I’ve brought out my gorgeously elaborate earrings - earrings that I haven’t worn in years because my long hair hid them.
I spent $100 today on scarves and hats from one of my new favorite websites.
I’m thinking about getting contacts. I haven’t had them since I was 18, but y’all have made me appreciate my eyes.
All baby steps. Baby steps on the road to acceptance that my hair may not grow back.
It’s not all bad, either.
The hairs on my chin? Not growing any more. No waxing of my ’stache is necessary.
I think I could go longer before shaving my pits and my legs, but I’ve been doing that every day since I was 14 or so… and old habits are hard to break.
Coming back to Chicago was a huge baby step (no, that’s not an oxymoron - it’s an apt description) for me.
I don’t go to an office every day anymore. People didn’t see me gradually losing my hair to get to where I am today, so the questions that I see floating around in their minds that would have been answered while I still had some hair didn’t get asked. Now, they’re uncomfortable asking. I’m uncomfortable volunteering.
(Of course, the people I’m closest to here - they all know what’s going on. I needed a group of trusted friends to listen for the wild rumors and to set people straight. )
So, to celebrate my giant baby step, I’m going to be sitting outside over on Rush this evening. Drinking wine. In my green scarf.
—- Oh, and the other thing that is a “first time since” for today? The first fuckin’ time I’ve had heels on since the last time I was in Chicago. Well, I’ve had them on, for pictures for Kelley, but I haven’t had to walk around in them. There’s nothing like a pair of peep-toe slingbacks for strutting along in the Summer. In the city. —-
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There’s nothing like a pair of peep-toe slingbacks for strutting along in the Summer.
Tell it sister!
I love how, even pre-6:00AM, you have a sharp comeback. This is the reason I worship you.
Solomon’s last blog post..The “Things I’m Grateful For” July contest - NOW RUNNING!!
My mom had alopecia when she was my age… only she lost clumps and not all of her hair. Another of her friends went through what you are - did the whole wig bit. Good for you getting more and more courage. Rock the scarfs! You are brave and I commend you.
Lindz’s last blog post..The Pros and Cons to long island iced tea before flying (on a plane)
Distract them with cleavage - Awsome!
I, too, LOVE that you’re deploying the cleavage as a mitigation measure. BRILLIANT, Hotfessional, BRILLIANT.
This post made me want to shout a big Hurrah from the hills of Oakland. But even as loud-mouthed as I am, I’m pretty sure Chicago’s louder and so you wouldn’t hear me from there. But know that I’m cheering for you, your scarves, your funky-cool-dangly earrings, your cleavage, your peep-toe slingbacks and your glass of wine. A toast to you, dahling.
Way to be…I’m proud of you and your baby steps…you’ll be fine, scarves rock
I’ve got some really kewl ones that I would send your way if you like…let me know…
Carrie’s last blog post..passing
You look good! I mean, what I could see of you…
suburbancorrespondent’s last blog post..Maunderings
I’m JEALOUS! So JEALOUS! Well, if I could get those peep-toe slingbacks for a dollar maybe and two sizes bigger than the 1-dollar Birkenstocks with which I am hoping to adorn my pregnant feet, I might just face the pain.
Contacts, by the way, are awesome. Especially the 8-ball or cat-eye ones! Go for it, and you’ll have the floor for the entire meeting, hehe.
You look awesome, by the way.
charlotte’s last blog post..Unavoidable measures
Mrs. Hot, you rock!!! You go and knock the sight out of their eyes with your kick-ass peep toe slingbacks, your rockin’ scarves, blingin’ bling, and, hell yah!, your cleavage-bearing tops.
Stick it to the man, sista!
Sarah’s last blog post..Fall Fabric Swap!
Ms. Hot, you totally KICK ASS!
You go, girl . . .
Liz J in Central Illinois’s last blog post..Everything Went Well!
Peep toe sling backs make everything better, especially in red! Besides, you’re gorgeous no matter what.
I loooove that you are showing some cleavage to distract and enhance, so awesome. Go you for baby steps, it’s a crazy world out there and you sailed through with grace AND style, so mega points for you. Personally, I like glasses, but you should try the contacts and see if you like them! Do whatever you want to gussy up.
Jess in MA’s last blog post..Getting Rid Of Mouse- Easy Style
Congratulations on your Huge Baby Step Hot! Good for you, and if there was a better day (in Chicago) to show off awesome cleavage and peep-toed heels, I can’t think of it.
Because of you, I’ve actually instituted ‘Alternate Cleavage Fridays’ where I work
Chris’s last blog post..The phone call
You are beautiful babe! Show that cleavage and strut those heels! If anything that b**ch should be the one that’s green . . . with envy!
celticbuffy’s last blog post..If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Your Mother
Great accessories are a must and you’ve proven that today. Congrats on getting through today!
Jen on the Edge’s last blog post..The Boy’s toy
If I were half as gorgeous as you, I’d be golden. But alas. The fact that you’re taking GIANT baby steps is awesome. I’m so glad you don’t cry when you look in the mirror. What a waste of being Hot. Maybe I’ll start showing off cleavage to distract from the troll-like face. Yes. By george, I think I’ve got it!
Hyphen Mama’s last blog post..Viewing Life Through a Camera Lens
There is nothing more memorable than a mysterious lady with green eyes, her robes blowing in the breeze.
(I can’t remember where I read that, but I’ll try to track it down. It’s an awesome quote!)
So did it feel like you faced your demons?
daysgoby’s last blog post..mah holy one-holer
Um, Ree? You rock my world. That is all.
Mr Lady’s last blog post..Young Love
Scarves, cleavage, earrings, heels … sure if it makes you feel better, but you totally rule with your heart!
I applaud you Ree, no … I admire you … very much so.
Nancy’s last blog post..Cuffs
Good for you!
Pretty scarf!
I like you hair or no hair. Because it doesn’t affect your ability to drink alcohol.
Kristabella’s last blog post..Where I Try Not To Mention BlogHer More Than 10 Times
I think you’re pretty fucking cool.
Jenny’s last blog post..Tuesday
I would beat the one coworker, but then, I have a low tolerance for idiots these days… Have a good time in Chicago!
RC’s last blog post..My little cottage
Lookin’ good, Sugar! BTW Loved the “Mediteranean” & “Paris” scarves on that website. Now I want a good shot of your dangly earrings, because? I’m demanding that way.
TXPoppet’s last blog post..WFMW-Canning Tomatoes
Your baby steps are really adding up! Good for you!
barbra’s last blog post..DONE!
Oooh a green scarf is *almost* as good as green hair! Now you need a purple one as well.
And ((hugs)). It’s all baby steps.
Veronica’s last blog post..It Might Be Hormones…
damn ree, you’re hot.
zeghsy’s last blog post..out of the woodwork
And you totally rock that scarf babe. Now print out my smiting pic and keep it in your purse. And every time someone pisses you off or looks at you the wrong way pull out that pic and know that I am flipping the bird at them.
Cause you are a hot rocking chick. And I love ya.
Kelley’s last blog post..I ain’t got no more kidneys to sell…
I still think you’re hot!
And I wish I had cleavage to show off. If my boobs suddenly grew from their now barely-A to B or above I’d be wearing low-cut shirts and showing them off, too.
Jacki’s last blog post..So long, farewell…
I still think that you look just the way you are HOT!fessional. That scarf is kicking ass bringing out MORE damn green in your eyes, maybe that is what Janice was seeing (Nah, she is just a donkey-ball bitch anyway!). How was Rush and sitting outside!
Wbppsh7’s last blog post..Free Mammogram (guys, don’t run off, you can help)
Good for you, sweetie! Very pretty scarf. I’m sure it took a lot of courage to go back and see people who didn’t know what was going on. Good on ya, mate! “In the summer, in the city, in the summer, in the city”. I can’t remember any more of the lyrics, but I love that song.
Shelly’s last blog post..Awesome. Not Awesome.
Love the self portrait - you look gorgeous!
I had no idea the alopecia had gotten so much worse. ((hugs))
Lucky git though… if your leg and pit-hair stop growing I will be jealous
well, you know what I mean. 
Marylin’s last blog post..Love the summer!
It sounds like you need a pair of ridiculously oversized, glamtastic sunglasses to set the scarf off to full effect. Then skip over Chicago and lounge on a beach in Miami.
Laurel’s last blog post..Blog Share III
Usually a lurker - I read in my reader, but I had to stop by and say that you look wonderful, darling. And finding a good use for cleavage gawkers - AWESOME!
anymommy’s last blog post..Situational Ethics and Hypocrisy
Baby steps my butt - you are runnin’ in stilettos my friend.
Seriously - just from the phone snippet, your style is spot on and its stunning. (And, of course, you put cleavage and heels into the mix - they won’t know what hits them.) And, for the record, the first person that steps to you the wrong way - send ‘em my way. I’ll set ‘em straight.
And, plus, like the others above said, you ROCK!
Lys’s last blog post..The 80s - Revisited Under Duress…
Rock the contacts. And strut the girls. Because man, if you can, you ought to. God didn’t give us those things to make us play Hide the Big ‘Uns all our lives.
Pamela’s last blog post..cinco de mayo, part 3
Have fun in Chicago..I love that town, wish it wasn’t so freeking expensive.
I didn’t realize you were at the cueball state. I thought the godaweful shots helped. I guess I didn’t click on the link to find out about alopecia areata.. my bad.
Scarves and hats are very cool..but I can’t do it. I don’t know why, they slide off my head. Maybe I have a funny shapped head, I don’t know.
So..zits on the head? Or do they go away w/ no hair?
I know this is VERY racist and I’m going to stero type..but black women are bald and beautiful..have you ever seen a black woman that has no hair that doesn’t look good?? So I’m thinking you can get a tan…are you with me..get a tan..and rock the bald white girl look.. K?
mp’s last blog post..Pulling my HAIR out!
First of all, ToTal ((HUGS)) for you. This has to be stressful, and you are managing to handle it with humor and grace just beautifully. (Although, you have my total permission to rip that woman’s head right off her body and hand it to her on a platter if she even looks at you cross-eyed again. How annoying can one person be?)
Second, enjoy Chicago while you are there. Screw everyone else!
It would almost be worth it, to stop these hairs on my chin growing in.
Almost.
You’re very brave. It would be very difficult for me to go through that, but as always, you do it with grace.
Candy’s last blog post..Cashing In
Your baby steps aren’t going to measure anywhere near small or babyish. You are covering ground and “getting there”. Love the cleavage bearing, peep toe shoe, dangley earring, scarf wearing, woman that is YOU.
You rock!
Krissa’s last blog post..The DeBakey debacle.
I salute your courage.
melissa’s last blog post..General Awesomeness
Rock those scarves, gir!
Katie’s last blog post..They kinda sucked
I think you look beautiful in that scarf, crappy cell phone picture or not!
Swishy’s last blog post..A desk says a thousand words
I love that you are making lemonade. I’ve been doing that a bit in my own life of late because why the hell not take anything good that can be extracted from even what’s otherwise not so much “good.” And a little extra sleep where hair styling would have been would be on my list, too, along with a bucket load of the best looking scarves. You are awesome.
Maggie’s Mind’s last blog post..Call Me Maurice
I imagine the scarf will get hot in the Summer. Perhaps you should consider some scalp tattoos? Kidding! Well…maybe not. I’d do it if it were me. Losing my hair? Fuck that I’m getting a scalptat!
Maybe bitch woman was commenting on the green top? We still hate her though.
Isn’t it a known beauty secret to distract for areas you don’t want attention by accentuating another feature? The cleavage is just following professional advice!
Lyvvie’s last blog post..And so it begins.
MAN!! Why didn’t you say that to her! That would have been incredible…
I had a snarky comment today around 930…
You would have been so proud of me Ree.
Julie’s last blog post..Whip it Up: Week #2 Crazy- Creamy Crab Stuffed Mushrooms