Jul 22 2008
Tuesday. Gack.
Oh mah holy hell y’all.
6:50 a.m. - Something is going “beeeeeep beeeeeep beeeeeep” in my ear. I crack my eyes open and reach for the alarm. Silly me, I committed to go to the track to run with Mr. Hot. What the fuck was I thinking? I can barely walk before coffee. I’m gonna run? Snort.
8:05 a.m. - Swigging water after our 12 revolutions of the track. Walk on the odd-numbers, run on the evens. We call it “old people’s interval training”. Today, though, we did 3/4 of the way around walking, 1 1/4 running. Yay us! And I never even fell over once! Shit - soccer destroyed my knees and my toes. (And did I mention? No coffee yet.)
8:30 a.m. - Shower. Breakfast. Grab some coffee.
9:00 a.m. - Attend a conference call covering “Career Planning”. Put phone on mute and say sarcastically to the presenter, “I already know what your career plan is for me. The freakin’ unemployment line! Bastard.”
9:50 a.m. - Flip the bird to the phone when the presenter uses that time worn phrase, “We finished early! I’m giving you 10 minutes of your life back!” Apparently we should all kiss his ass. The Hotfessional declines to do so and heads to the bathroom to pee.
9:51 a.m. - Begin working on my mid-year Performance Review. Go to get more coffee and figure out that the pot shut off and it’s lukewarm. Decide I’m too lazy to microwave a cup - and get a bottle of water instead. (Too lazy to microwave a cup of coffee. Obviously the whole running thing scrambled my flippin’ brain.)
10:00 a.m. - 5:45 p.m. - Participate in the Process call from Hell. Manage to get 3 bathroom breaks. Since the asshats decided that I was going to be the presenter, I had to have my laptop screen “shared” the entire time. No blog reading. No email reading. No fuckin’ Twittering. (I missed you!) I did manage, though, to finish the trim on a baby sweater and bonnet that I’m working on. And though I couldn’t tell them all how fucking stupid they were, I did stick my tongue out and make liberal use of my middle finger. On both hands.
5:45 p.m. - Hang up (until we reconvene tomorrow for round 183,276 283 17 4). Eat my ‘dinner’ of brown rice, green beans, and pine nuts. Feel like a squirrel.
6:30 p.m. - Sit on porch with Mr. Hot debating whether his 321 calorie glass of red wine (this is not a wine-glass glass, obviously) or my vodka/limeade (215.5 calories) is more satisfying. Of course, since I’m sure I won’t stop at one…it all depends on who has more willpower.
7:55 p.m. - Decide that I need (NEED) my internets fix and plop down on the couch to write this post.
8:06 p.m. - Remember that I left out a part. And I have to tell you all! Dudes!!!
While I was sitting there (around 5:00) trying not to stab my pen through my right eye (the left one was stabbed around 1:23 p.m. as near as I can tell), a car drove down the street. Light-greenish Subaru wagon with a cargo carrier on the top.
I saw this car yesterday while Mr. Hot was cutting grass. They stopped at the end of the driveway, as his back was turned to the street. I thought maybe they were trying to ask him directions. (Ohhhh, poor lost old people. If I wasn’t up on a phone call, I’d come help you!)
Since he wears earplugs when he cuts grass (and y’know, he was cutting.grass. With a loud.ass.mower), he couldn’t hear them, so they went on up the street. They turned around and went on back down the street. And - they were gone. (Bye bye!)
Sooooooooooo, annnnywayyyy, that was yesterday, right?
Today, the same car comes back! And stops. Right-the-fuck in front of my house! And they start taking pictures! Of the front of the house. Of the driveway. I’m completely dumbfounded by what I’m seeing. Stunned. Silent. (Shush. It does happen.)
Shortman was sitting next to me up in the office. I punch “Mute” on my phone and start pointing. And bouncing. “Get my binoculars, fast.” , I finally get my mouth to start working. (I’m going to take down this ass’s license plate number. WTF? Taking pictures of my house????) “Get ready to write this down.”
I try to follow the back end of this car. I bash my head on the window because of the angle I’m turning my head. The only way I could read the whole plate would be to punch out the screen and crawl onto the roof. Even though I considered it as an option, I figured I’d lose my cover if they came back by. (Or would they not notice a bald woman in a neon green tank top sitting on the roof spying on them?)
I can only get the first three numbers - I think they’re 096. I think it’s a Michigan plate. But then the new Michigan plates have the letters first. So maybe it’s not a Michigan plate. Or my binoculars are cheap…
Or I’m just freakin’ blind.
(I did stab that left eye earlier.)
So the car goes down the street and then turns around and drives REALLY slow back past my house. I have my useless-ass binoculars trained on the car. There’s a giant Lab in the backseat and a giant woman in the passenger side.
Annnnnnnd.
That’s it. They drove away. With pictures of my house!
Y’all? I have to say it again. What the fuck?
—-8:38 p.m. - I can’t figure it out. So I decide to go pour that second drink. Damn. I’m gonna have to run again in the morning. —-
![[del.icio.us]](http://images.del.icio.us/static/img/delicious.small.gif){kind=small}
Not for nothing, but the last time someone was coming by taking pictures of my house, some asshat lawyer had set it up to be sold as a foreclosure and listed the sale in the paper. But these guys probably just liked your flowers!
Shania’s last blog post..A deconstruction of the implications of lifestyle choices on the future of the world
You must have forgotten to include the part about mainlining heroin because seriously, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING BEING THAT ACTIVE??? Now go sit down and eat an entire bag of cheetos like the rest of us
xoxo
The Over-Thinker’s last blog post..And then I became Canadian….and it didn’t even involve alcohol!
That’s creeeeeeepy. Sounds like an obsessed super Hot fan doing some drive-by stalking. Not that I would know anything about drive-by stalking. Nope. Not me. No siree Bob. (There’s absolutely no evidence to support that restraining order! Just sayin’.)
A few Halloweens ago, one of the houses the kids Trick-or-Treated at took their picture when they came to the door. That creeped me the eff out. We’ve skipped that house every year since.
AmyM’s last blog post..Should I laugh or cry?
Are your pretty flowers in the front? I would stop and take a photo of that.
Or maybe they wanted the bald lady in thr green tanktop to come out and put on a show!
Kristabella’s last blog post..BlogHer Aught Eight - The Cheetos Caper
That’s more than a little creepy. If you see them again, I’d try approaching the car looking pissed. If they rush off, you’d be closer to get their plate number and if they don’t, you’ll probably find out what the hell they’re doing…although I would suggest taking Mr. Hot or a big dog with you.
Tina’s last blog post..Van-quished
“Career planning”??? Good one. *snort* At least we don’t have to do this bullsh*t twice a year at Space Cadet Central. The picture thing would totally creep me out. Perhaps they were people trying to build a house and just liked yours?
charlotte’s last blog post..Wa(i)st(e)
Maybe they’re stalking out your house when no one’s home… or they grew up there cuz that is a stalkerish weird thing I would totally do.
Fishing Around’s last blog post..Motorcycle Driveby
1. Alarm going off at ten to seven? No sympathy. Sorry. Mine goes off at 5:30am every freaking morning and I go to work.
2. Sympathy at the length of the planning process/meeting. I’ve been in those types of meetings. I think my record is something like 20 hours (9am to 5am - no that’s not a typo).
3. I think next time those people come you should go out and ask them to make an offer on your house. Then turn them down and tell them to go away.
Of course Kristabella’s idea is good too.
Nicole’s last blog post..Use Sunscreen
WHY are y’all trying to be so healthy. That’s just messed up.
As is the stalker car. But maybe they like the color of your paint? Or maybe it’s the landscaping?
Jen on the Edge’s last blog post..I’m too lazy to knock down the cobwebs
Okay, you have a stalker who has figured out the Hotfessional lives there and is trying to catch a glimpse of you…
In all seriousness, WI plates are back to numbers first, now… Might be one of us.
That is really creepy and is creeping me out more and more. It happened to one of my friends, and she finally figured out it was another person going into the same profession as she was, who was casing her house and home-run business. Still bizarre as all get-out.
Have a few more glasses of whatever for me, as I have a very busy week and one crappy-ass work assignment I need to somehow take care of in the midst of everything else I have to do.
RC’s last blog post..Blowing Bubbles!
Now if they come back grab a camera and take pics of them but walk by slow as if you are driving by them.
Obi-son’s last blog post..WTF Vacation?
Okay, you go out and tell them they have GOT THE WRONG HOUSE because they must be trainee PI’s who read your blog and want the lowdown on the neighbours before you break it to us.
I prefer stabbing the upper thigh. Saves you from early morning freaks AND doesn’t take out valuable senses.
jeanie’s last blog post..Courtesy of Aussie Bloggers Forum
One time several years ago I was out in the front yard with my kids when a car slowed and the driver started aiming his camera at my house. “What are you doing?” I yelled. He was taking pictures of comp houses for a mortgage company. Somebody was buying a house in my neighborhood and their lender was making sure they were paying market value for their house, so wanted to look at photos of comparable houses that had sold in the recent past. My Realtor said this is common practice.
Or
When I wanted to repaint the exterior of my house, I drove around taking pictures of houses with nice color schemes to help me decide.
I do this for landscaping ideas as well.
Or
Maybe they had lived there in the past. I would totally take a photo of my childhood home if I was back in that neighborhood, even if it looked totally different. Then I could show my parents and my brother what it looks like now.
All that, and I really don’t think I’m a creepy stalker!
barbra’s last blog post..This one will be shorter, I promise
Why not take some photographs of the freaky people who are photographing your house? Or maybe you could follow them on a bicycle back to where they live, and retaliate by taking photographs of where they live.
The thought of someone taking photographs of my house without my permission freaks me the thurk out.
Solomon’s last blog post..The “Things I’m Grateful For” July contest - NOW RUNNING!!
That is really weird… could have been taking pics for many reasons!
Hope you find out what! Next time (if there’s a next time!) you should go find out what’s going on! (Not guns blazing mind… just incase
)
Marylin’s last blog post..Standing at last!!
I loved Shania’s comment.
I have to say that I would be a bit freaked too (obviously the whole NTH, and the “Mayor” issues wouldn’t have anything to do with this would it?), however a couple commenters have valid reasons, however did the 096 pull INTO your driveway or just in front of the house (still on the street). I don’t know I would still be a little freaked. Keep us updated, and please don’t be scary and find poltergeist music or anything to post in the near future!!!
Wbppsh7’s last blog post..Dirty Bird
I thought about taking pictures of a really pretty tree in someone’s yard last year, but I would have knocked on their door and asked first. Promise! I think there are valid reasons to take pictures of people’s houses or yards, but you should ask first. I’m Southern that way.
Shelly’s last blog post..Odds and Ends
OK, when we were on vacation last month we were going to drive within fifteen minutes of one of the houses I grew up in. (This one was like 2nd through 6th grade.) AAAnyway; we made a detour to the town and walked around in the yard of my childhood taking pictures (there was no one home) until one of the neighbors appeared ready to call the police. Maybe it was a trip down memory lane for the drive-by’s?
Fannie’s last blog post..Overheard
You better start locking your doors.
Candy’s last blog post..The Right Stuff?
What in the world could they have been doing?!?! That would creep the heck out of me.
Laurel’s last blog post..Whip It Up #3: Crispy Scallion and Asiago Potato Pancakes
That’s just creepy - - just be careful, okay?
And make sure your doors are locked and the guns are loaded . . .
Liz J in Central Illinois’s last blog post..A Turn-Around - - Finally
Lots of reasonable explanations for the avid photographer taking pics of your house. Lots of creepy explanations as well. But now that you are running, you can chase the car down the street, right? Oh, and no one told me that running must be combined with eating like a squirrel. Did I miss that memo?
Dingo’s last blog post..Go Find The Funny Caption Contest Results!
Okay… years ago– I drove around a couple of times and asked some people where they got their house siding from…what the shade color was called. Hold up samples to houses I liked.
My children were humiliated the one time…
I just pulled into the driveway and started YACKING away to the homeowners.
Beth from the Funny Farm’s last blog post..Around the Barn
I have a friend who’s a real estate appraiser and she’s often asked why the hell she’s driving slowly in neighborhoods, taking pictures, etc.
I’d be weirded out too, but you know these things usually have very simple answers…. I’ll be waiting to hear how this turns out.
and while we’re at it…. how are your neighbors?
Jenny’s last blog post..Saturday, 12:40 p.m.
Last fall I took a trek back to the small town I lived in as a little kid. I sat in front of the “old house” and took tons of pictures. The next day I drove by again… and took more pictures.
I’m pretty sure they had the same reaction. I only WISH they’d have come out and said something. Then I’d have asked if I could go inside.
Yay for the MUTE button. My favorite telephone button.
Hyphen Mama’s last blog post..How to Make Feta Cheese at Home–12 Simple Steps
I have a love hate relationship with conference calls.
I hate to be on them but I LOVE LOVE LOVE putting it on mute and spewing hate towards the presenter or flipping them off….
If we could only do that in real life and not get fired…
ahhh
Julie’s last blog post..Mid Week Mama Bailey- Stay Tuned!!
Listen, if someone was taking pics of my house, next time I saw them, I’d see if I can find some “stop sticks” and toss them in front of the tires. Then, of course when they stopped, we’d have a “Come to Jesus/Moses/Xenu” chat and see what their explanation was.
Sorry - have some *ahem* anger issues today but nothing that can’t be helped by a little libation or two.
Seriously, that’s just creepy that people are taking pics of your house. Could it be someone trying to investigate the neighbor and shot your house by mistake?
Lys’s last blog post..FW: Shoe Love: The Fabulous Flats Edition…
Seriously, that would be freakin’ creepy!
And, wtf are you thinking?!?! Getting up that early and actually *running*! INSANE!!
The photo taking could definitely be weird. I would find it weird. But, on the other hand, both my mom and dad used to take pictures of random houses because they liked the landscaping, tree, flower box, paint scheme, window shutters, mailbox, front door design, etc. Then half the time they would use them for inspiration at home. In turn, we had people stop and take pictures or leave us notes asking what color paint we used on our front door and what kind of tree was by the garage. Clearly I was mortified as a kid!
Jess in MA’s last blog post..A Little Vintage
Why do you have such an interesting neighborhood…me..boring..
mp’s last blog post..Prayer - Good Wishes Request PLEASE
Maybe they used to live there!
imhelendt’s last blog post..Slap Fest
Or they’re going to rob you. I know. I’m comforting! ;D
imhelendt’s last blog post..Slap Fest