Apr 14 2010

The Hotfessional Strikes Again

Published by Ree at 12:35 am under Stupid things I do

Generally, I’m pretty good at speaking in public. I can even answer impromptu questions and sound reasonably intelligent. Today, however, I should have sat down, kept my mouth shut, and well…it wasn’t pretty.

The Setting:
A large conference room with about 60 people waiting to hear all about the contracts we just signed and how the terms of said contracts would change the way they do their jobs.

The Participants:
Leaders from my company. Managers, MY BOSS, my team, clients.

The Timeframe:
Between 9:00 a.m. and 11:00 a.m. today.

The Story:

Ehem.

So, one of my team was standing at the podium, very eloquently walking through the 20-page document we’ve spent the last three weeks developing. The room’s attention was on him. I was sitting in front of his podium, taking notes, preparing for my part of the presentation when someone decided to ask a question. He nodded at me and said, “The Hotfessional can probably explain that better, she’s been closer to that part of the negotiation process.”

I thanked him kindly, picked up the portable microphone that was laying on the table in front of me and turned to look at the crowd – which was, of course, all behind me. As I sat swiveling in my chair to make eye contact, I realized that I probably needed to stand up and turn around to actually, y’know, face the people trying to listen.

So I did.

I stood up, (with my back to 60 people), turned around, and sat daintily on the table. I answered the question, smiled, and sat back down in my seat.

As I did, my team member, the guy at the podium, slipped a piece of paper down onto the table in front of me.

What did it say?

Ree. The zipper on your skirt is wide open.

The Horror:
The zipper on my skirt was in the back. I was wearing black tights, but the control top part? VERY SHEER. Also, no panties under said tights.

—- I mooned 60 people today. —-

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31 responses so far

31 Responses to “The Hotfessional Strikes Again”

  1. Rachelon 14 Apr 2010 at 1:12 am

    THE HORROR!!
    Rachel´s last blog ..Read me? My ComLuv Profile

  2. Jen on the Edgeon 14 Apr 2010 at 1:23 am

    Well, rumor has it that you have a great ass, so you’ve got that going for you. :-)
    Jen on the Edge´s last blog ..Too big for their britches My ComLuv Profile

  3. Caton 14 Apr 2010 at 1:48 am

    So you were sharing …. :)

    I did the same thing at Christmas dinner with family many moons ago (pun intended). It was the source of laughter for a couple more get togethers and then it was someone else’s turn to be roasted.

    Just keep smiling, and be thankful the skirt’s zipper wasn’t in front.

  4. Kelon 14 Apr 2010 at 3:22 am

    hahahahahah – awe Ree – I’m so sorry I missed it. I could have definitely used a good laugh today. Not that I would have laughed outloud, but thanks so much for saring…you have totally just made my day!
    ~K
    Kel´s last blog ..Monday Suck My ComLuv Profile

  5. Graceon 14 Apr 2010 at 4:18 am

    Just imagine all the discussions after the attendees had with their spouses this evening.

    “So how was the conference honey? Anything interesting happen?”
    “Oh yeah! We got mooned by this hot chick in a skirt….”

  6. jeanon 14 Apr 2010 at 4:35 am

    You rock the pantyhose. Only you could do this and then continue on. I would have been 20 shades of red with hints of purple and excused myself to the bathroom.

  7. Shellyon 14 Apr 2010 at 1:15 pm

    HAHAHAHA!!! Yeah, at least the zipper wasn’t in the front. That would have been way worse!
    Shelly´s last blog ..40 Things My ComLuv Profile

  8. lceelon 14 Apr 2010 at 1:35 pm

    I am SO jealous times 60.
    lceel´s last blog ..About Photography Wednesday (and Art) My ComLuv Profile

  9. daysgobyon 14 Apr 2010 at 1:49 pm

    Oh NO!

    I raise my coffee mug in solidarity.
    daysgoby´s last blog ..the house in troy My ComLuv Profile

  10. Milk River Madmanon 14 Apr 2010 at 2:09 pm

    Always trust your first instinct. At least that was my philosophy on multiple choice tests in college. You have to give credit to your audience for holding it together and not letting you know what they knew. Great team effort.
    Milk River Madman´s last blog ..Movie clip Wednesday 4/14/10 My ComLuv Profile

  11. Jasonon 14 Apr 2010 at 3:47 pm

    Shut UP! That is fabulous. I’m sure you made everyone’s day.
    Jason´s last blog ..Rename The Jason Show? My ComLuv Profile

  12. Violeton 14 Apr 2010 at 4:42 pm

    Proving yet again that you really are the one and only Hotfessional.
    Violet´s last blog ..Sometimes threats do work My ComLuv Profile

  13. magpieon 14 Apr 2010 at 5:06 pm

    You. :)
    magpie´s last blog ..Wardrobe Wednesday: New Popsicornian My ComLuv Profile

  14. Krissaon 14 Apr 2010 at 7:34 pm

    OK…. so when can you expect the forthcoming pay raise? ;-)
    Krissa´s last blog ..These are a few of my fav-or-ite thiiiiings! My ComLuv Profile

  15. green girl in Wisconsinon 14 Apr 2010 at 8:45 pm

    BUTT I bet you had their undivided attention!
    green girl in Wisconsin´s last blog ..midweek update My ComLuv Profile

  16. Fannieon 14 Apr 2010 at 9:26 pm

    Why do they not notice these things BEFORE the meetings?
    Fannie´s last blog ..You Can’t Win with Us My ComLuv Profile

  17. Jennyon 14 Apr 2010 at 10:05 pm

    Bwaahahahah…you gotta wear panties at all times!

    No one noticed and even if they did they would never say something because they loved it or didn’t!

    did you at least kick ass at the meeting?

  18. Lyson 14 Apr 2010 at 10:20 pm

    Oh. My. Heavens! No you didn’t!!!! Too much – way too much and seriously, I needed that giggle.

    I’m sure you totally rocked the meeting – and woke up a few attorneys in there. ;)
    Lys´s last blog ..A Cookbook After This Stiletto Gal’s Own Heart My ComLuv Profile

  19. Amberon 15 Apr 2010 at 12:35 am

    I gasped out loud and my cheeks turned pink for you when I read that. I am so sorry that happened. Well, I’m sure you made the all the guys day, because you are the HOTfessional.

  20. Liz J in Central Illinoison 15 Apr 2010 at 1:15 am

    Oh my – - I laughed out loud when I read this. Sorry . . .

    But then I sent this post to my supervisor and told her, “I am SO glad this didn’t happen to one of us during our presentation in Chicago this past weekend!”

    I feel bad for you, but I really did need the laugh today . . . it was a total zoo in our office. . . . .
    Liz J in Central Illinois´s last blog ..Grace In Small Things: 15/2010 My ComLuv Profile

  21. Tinaon 15 Apr 2010 at 2:46 am

    Oh, my God! Thank you for the laugh. I’m so sorry I laughed, but it’s too damn funny. Are you laughing yet? I’ve missed you, but I’m back now. Or at least trying to be. Been keeping up with your blog when I can. Busy times for you!
    Tina´s last blog ..The year in review: My ComLuv Profile

  22. mnon 15 Apr 2010 at 3:31 am

    what did you do AFTER the note was passed. eh, no biggie. dont lose sleep over it. i knew a girl who sat up in a meeting with a large rip in the side seams of her tight skirt probably from being so tight, so a gaping hole exposing her skin. she made it. the thing is ppl saw it and no one told her. i’m one of those ppl who will usually tell if i can get to the person. you made it.

  23. Haiku Trollon 15 Apr 2010 at 6:37 pm

    Subconciously, you WANTED to moon em!
    Haiku Troll´s last blog ..HAIKU CONTEST: PLACES and BOUDREAUX BONUS JOKE My ComLuv Profile

  24. BusyDadon 15 Apr 2010 at 8:45 pm

    You’re a little bit corporate, a little bit rock n roll. Rock on, Ree. Rock. On.
    BusyDad´s last blog ..Birthday. Boy… My ComLuv Profile

  25. Kristabellaon 15 Apr 2010 at 9:59 pm

    OMG! I’m turning red in the face FOR you!

    Good thing you have a sense of humor and can brush it off. Plus, they were probably so enthralled with the topic, they didn’t even notice. :)
    Kristabella´s last blog ..CAT-astrophe My ComLuv Profile

  26. AFon 16 Apr 2010 at 1:56 pm

    I’m sure you have the “hottest” ass (just like the rest of you). So, no worries, eh?
    ;)
    AF´s last blog ..Phrase For Phriday My ComLuv Profile

  27. Hyphen Mamaon 16 Apr 2010 at 4:34 pm

    That is SO HAWT!!

    You go girl!
    Hyphen Mama´s last blog ..If you want to become a square, just have a daughter… My ComLuv Profile

  28. Boxeron 16 Apr 2010 at 5:55 pm

    and did they say “thank you?”

    ;-)
    Boxer´s last blog ..Fried-eh? My ComLuv Profile

  29. Hilaryon 18 Apr 2010 at 3:39 pm

    I feel your pain… I pants split at the seam at a staff meeting a few weeks ago, and everyone int he room noticed…and commented!
    Hilary´s last blog ..jade is the new black My ComLuv Profile

  30. Theresaon 20 Apr 2010 at 2:07 pm

    LOVE IT! Thanks for making my morning better.

  31. kimon 20 Apr 2010 at 9:16 pm

    Fuck I adore you, trashy open zipper sleaze and all!
    ;)
    kim´s last blog ..A zit the size of the Pope’s shame and my invisible underwear. My ComLuv Profile

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