…of snow, y’all.  Mah Gawd.  Get your minds outta there. 

So, Mr. Hot and I woke up this morning, (him, about an hour earlier than me, yes…but we both did wake up), and looked outside to find everything buried.  Mr. Hot trudged all the way down to the end of the driveway to get the newspaper.

No paper. 

Mr. Hot used to deliver newspapers in rural West-by-Gawd-Virginia.  I can remember waking up at 2:30 a.m. in the middle of winter, after an ice storm, and pleading with him to be careful in the mountains.  Like the post office, neither rain, sleet, ice, nor suck-ass snow would prevent him from making his appointed rounds. 

Our main roads are fairly flat and pretty darned clear.   But, there was no newspaper to keep me company while I ate my peanut butter toast and drank my coffee.  And I couldn’t get my fix of “Last Minute Shopping Deals.”  WTF?  Methinks the delivery guy’s tip may be a bit smaller than it would have been.  Even at 4 pm when we were outside clearing the driveway.  No newspaper. 

So, we decided to re-arrange our “office” (aka Shortman’s domain).  Since I received my Canon MP530  and we bought a new stand for it, we needed to move the corner desk, and clean out some of the stuff.  When we moved here in June, 2006, we pretty much took everything that had been in the “old” office and put it in the “new” office and called it good.

We managed to accomplish moving lots of heavy furniture with only one contusion (courtesy of desk dropped on top of my left foot) and no broken bones.  Victory!

Once that was done (enough for now, more to do), the three of us went out and shoveled the driveway.  Yes, you read that right.  Shoveled.  As in with an actual shovel.  Wooden handle.  Plastic shovely-part.  And I’m sure my back, when I wake up in the morning, will make sure I know that there was no snow-fuckin-blower involved.  Our driveway is long.  

Then we ate.  Lots.  Bean burritos.  Yum.  Spanish rice.  Yum. Yum.  Mr. Hot and I started watching football.  We watched the Lions lose again.  I started drinking.  They started the season 6-2.  They’re now 6-8.  Sigh.  The Giants are on now, losing to Washington.  I know my buddy Cupcake is happy. 

And while I’ve been sitting here, the school’s automated notification system called me to tell me that school is cancelled for tomorrow.  So, yay! I don’t have to actually wake up and check the news to see if they closed.  Shortman is dancing.  Mr. Hot will be glad to have the extra hands around tomorrow when the plows come by and pile this crap up at the end so we can’t get out anyway. 

—- I have to finish up the Christmas shopping tomorrow.  How in the hell did it get to be December 16th already y’all?  I hope you and your loved ones are keeping warm and enjoying the season.  I’m going to get the heating pad. —-

Have y’all seen ‘The Family Stone’?  Geez.  So much for the ‘comedy’ genre it has as descriptor.  Oh mah holy hell.  I just cried my freakin’ eyes out.  Not fair. 

Just sayin’. 

After the NaBloPoMo-Fiasco of a meme every.other.day. for key-rysts sake, I promised no memes in December. Well, guess what? This isn’t a meme you can do any other month besides December, and today was taken up with meetings. The only exciting thing that happened was ordering an “appreciation lunch” (which, in corporate speak is ‘We must be “p.c.” and not say Christmas lunch, or Holiday lunch, because it’s not everyone’s holiday) for 20 people from Olive Garden.

Well, I didn’t actually do the ordering. I picked the menu. (The Power, it may go right to my head!) Well, dammit, okay, so I picked the desserts. Geez y’all. I do get to be the boss sometimes.

Like Here! So when I promised “No Memes for the month of December?” I lied. Well, I didn’t lie, I just didn’t think that I could become so boring again, so quickly. But I did. So here it is. Courtesy of Marianne.

Christmas Memememememe

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper, definitely, with lots and lots of hand-tied bows. And coordinating tags. Except maybe basketballs. And cars. (Mr. Hot? That Jaguar? You wouldn’t even have to put a bow on it. Just park it in the garage.)

2. Real tree or artificial? Artificial. Duh.

3. When do you put up the tree? Usually the second weekend in December.

4. When do you take the tree down? As soon as I get tired of looking at it. Generally, though, I wait until AFTER the holiday, but it’s been close a couple of years.

5. Do you like eggnog? Gag. I think I did one time. But I think it was an eggnog milkshake with brandy in it. Every other time afterwards? Gag.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? Damned good question. Is it worse than sad that I can’t remember? That nothing really sticks out? My mother used to see if she could make me cry with certain presents. Like the year I was certain I was getting a horse. All of the hints pointed in that direction. I heard whispering about it. I was so excited, I was nearly peeing my pants Christmas morning. What did I get? A horse-shaped candle. They did that to see if I would cry. (I didn’t. I just got pissed. And yes, I did, at one point I did own a horse, but I did not get her that year. Or for Christmas.)

7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes. Belonged to my grandmother. Brings back wonderful memories of my uncles dressing up like Santa and Midnight Masses and traditional Polish Christmas Eves. I probably shouldn’t display it where the cat can get to Mary.

8. Hardest person to buy for? Mr. Hot. And his freakin’ birthday is New Year’s Day. The pressure is tremendous.

9. Easiest person to buy for? Me. I like everything and anything to do with presents. I’m a gift whore. (Which is probably why I can’t remember my favorite Christmas present.)

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Well, there was that plastic dolly tea-set from my Dad’s mother when I was 12.

11. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail. With handwritten notes. (Seriously y’all. I’m still old school there.)

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? A Christmas Carol. With Alastair Sim. Black & White version. 1938. There is no other Scrooge as far as I’m concerned.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Hopefully in time for UPS to deliver. Generally I don’t have to pay for overnight shipping. Let’s not go there, eh?

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? No. Uh-uh. See #9.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Anything that comes from a mail-order place. Hickory Farms is a good start. Harry & David’s is even better. Wine Country Gift Baskets? Excellent. Oh, and pierogis and czernina.

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? This year? Multi-colored. Non-flashing. If I can manage to break them all though, I may change next year.

17. Favorite Christmas song? Carol of the Bells. And here’s a rockin’ version:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ElLtgZXX30&rel=1]

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Definitely a staying home person. With the Practice Husband we traveled every year, and I couldn’t stand it. I’m really glad Mr. Hot is a veg like me.

19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer’s? Oh yes. But only if I sing, and you don’t want that.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Santa Claus. But he’s holding a light that is supposed to look like a star.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? 1 on Christmas Eve. The rest on Christmas morning. Those are The.Rules.

22. What’s the most annoying thing this time of the year? The fact that it’s in the winter in the northern hemisphere, and I live in Michigan? So it’s fuckin’ cold. I want to have Christmas in Australia one of these years.

23. What I love most about Christmas? The look on Shortman’s face, even at 16, when he sees the presents under the tree. THAT never gets old.

—- There’s no way I’m looking for coordinating gift tags for a meme, so if you’d like this present, feel free to take it. And this time, I mean it. No more memes until next year. —-

I’ve been a tad distracted recently, so I have a couple of things that I must remember to post. First, the tree.

It was still standing this morning although I didn’t have time to check before I left to see how many ornaments were strewn about the living room.  I can tell you though, that there’s a missing lamb and Mary keeps getting carried off by a certain set of “Kitteh Paws”.

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I must thank my Secret Blogger Santa.  She (Well, I’m assuming that she’s a she.  hmmm.  Laurel?  RA?  I don’t remember seeing that particular spreadsheet graph.  Get on that, eh?) sent me a couple of really cute pairs of earrings.  This is the pair I’m wearing today.

(Yes, I took it with my camera phone.  I’ve never claimed my photography skills were beyond ‘basic suck’.) Aren’t they darling?  The other pair are gray circles - a bit bigger and very versatile.  Thanks so much to my SBS. 

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I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what to get Mr. Hot for Christmas. I was going to get him a subscription to The Economist. Then he started talking about getting one. Then he decided he didn’t want to because he wanted to join the NHRA (National Hot Road Assocation - drag racin’). Then I started looking for his Amazon.com wish list. His name is as common as “John Smith” and he must not have entered his state, or email address. So, I’m on the 3rd page of plain old “John Smith”s. Trying to decipher from the goods on the list whether it’s his list or not.I’m guessing that the one listing “The Masters of Russian Animation” is probably not his.  Ditto for the one with every “Justice League” dvd ever made.  Or the one with “How To Survive a Robot Uprising: Tips on Defending Yourself Against the Coming Rebellion“.

It’s not easy buying stuff for the man who has everything.  Or is willing to wait “until it goes on sale.”  Or wants to pick stuff out for himself.  I’ve gotten him gift certificates before.  I’ve gotten him clothing.   I’ve even given him video games.   So, I’m picking a couple of books I hope he likes (If you are ever looking for me when I don’t show up here for a few days?  I’m probably buried under the stack of books that has fallen over in my living room.  Or bedroom.  Or office.)  and a sweatshirt.  (He better not be fucking reading this - he swears he doesn’t because he wants me to be free to rant about anything - and I believe him.  But if he decides to snoop around looking for his presents…. well, then, it serves him right.)

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As it gets closer and closer to the holidays, the office is becoming more and more like a ghost town. I shouldn’t be surprised because we have a production freeze on all technology systems from December 15 - January 15, so most of the development and project management staff save their vacation for those weeks. We have a pot-luck planned for the 19th, but I have no details on who is bringing what yet. And according to the weather reports, it’s going to stay gray all week long. Again. But, the resume was emailed off this morning, and 24 sent me an email thanking me for his birthday check and someone brought in homemade chocolate chip cookies.

—- I’m determined to keep a positive attitude that goes beyond “I’m damned positive I hate this shitty winter weather.” And thank you all for the comments on my new home. I’m thinking about some kind of housewarming contest where I can give a little something to someone for stopping by and bringing friends. Stay tuned. —-

So, I’m seriously considering moving to Wordpress in 2008, which means I don’t want to spend a ton of time to redecorate here…. but - I do want to give you all an opportunity to win prizes in an anti-contest. And to do that, I need to make some effort at sprucing this place up for the holiday season.

As you know, I’m hopeless at real, live trees. So, I put up a silver, aluminum tree. And, like my great-grandmother, I have one of those rotating disk lamps that I shine on it. (Oh mah gawd people. Does anyone else remember those? I’m trying to find an image on GoogleImages, and can’t find one. Am I that freakin’ old?)

I like it. It’s simple. Unassuming. Like me. (snirk. snort.)

Aaaanywaaaaay. Go check it out:

All of the anti-rules and anti-prizes are listed.

—- A simple picture and a link will get you entered. The anti-contest ends December 10th, so get it in gear y’all. —-